The Wedding Planner:
How to Work Long Distance With Your Wedding Planner

Are you planning a destination wedding long distance? If so, you know the challenges you fact communicating via phone, email or fax with your wedding planner and planning an event at a hotel you may not have seen. To help with your planning, we've interviewed Laura Fox, Catering Sales Manager and Marriott Certified Wedding Planner, from the Boston Marriott Cambridge Center, for her tips on how to plan a long distance wedding.

When you are working long distance with a bride, what does your initial consultation with her include?  What questions will you have for her to help give you a better idea of her wedding wishes?

First and foremost, I like to speak with the bride in depth over the phone, getting to know her on a personal basis.  This rapport building stage may progress over several phone calls and e-mails.  In addition to certainly asking her what her wedding day vision may be, I want to know more about she and the groom and their likes and dislikes.  How did you meet?  How did he propose?  Where did she or he go to school?  Are you big sports fans?

 I also want to share information with her about myself and that I am a recent bride. I want her to feel comfortable talking with me and trusting me.  Planning a wedding can be difficult, planning a wedding from afar can be even more so. It is important that the bride "connects" with her wedding consultant so that she can rely on their dedication and knowledge as she prepares for her "Big Day!".

Once rapport is established, it is important for me to share with the bride my thoughts on whether or not our venue meets her needs.  Does our package realistically meet her budget requirements?  Does our setting meet her wedding day vision?  If so, I would suggest that she and the groom arrange for a trip to visit the site, as well as other sites before proceeding.  

How can brides best work with you long distance? (Photos of decorations? Detailed descriptions?)

The Internet and e-mail are wonderful tools.   Reception locations should offer updated customized web pages for viewing.  Wedding consultants often have digital pictures on hand of recent weddings and catering events.  They should be able to provide you with a list of references, previous brides who have planned a long distance wedding at their location.  In today's fast paced world, it is best to communicate with your reception consultant via e-mail.  Your consultant should always reply to your questions promptly.  A bride and groom may also want to coordinate periodic conference calls with the bride, groom, wedding consultant, and other key players eliminating the chance of miscommunication.

For which destination brides is a pre-wedding site inspection a good idea?

If at all possible, I would suggest that every bride and groom conduct a pre-wedding site inspection.  I find that most of the brides and grooms that I work with who are planning their wedding from afar, have ties to the immediate area.  Should the bride and/or groom not be able to make a trip to the location before signing a contract, arrange for a family member or close family friend to check out the location.  

 How can a bride who is arranging a pre-wedding site inspection make the best use of her time when she does come to visit the property?  At what point in her plans would it be most beneficial to her to make that trip?    

A bride should arrange at least two pre-wedding site inspection trips.  She should be organized with a wedding binder suitable for collecting brochures, business cards, and magazine clippings, and come prepared with detailed lists of questions.

The first trip should take place after the "gathering and collecting of information" stage and prior to signing a contract.  It would be helpful to select a weekend to visit multiple top choices for both ceremony and reception sites.  

The booking of these two sites go hand in hand.  Be sure to phone the contacts at each location to make sure that they, or a colleague, will be able to meet with you.  No sense flying 1000 miles with hopes of viewing a Grand Ballroom, only to find that the wedding consultant is not able to meet with you personally.  

Obtain as much local vendor information as possible during this trip.  Best case scenario, your consultant or function coordinator will also be able to guide you with additional vendor recommendations throughout your planning process.

Approximately four to five months prior to your wedding you will want to schedule a return trip.  It would be ideal if your trip could coincide with a wedding reception taking place at your venue.  This would be an ideal opportunity for you to view their operation in full swing.

Some of the tasks that you will want to accomplish during this hectic visit include:

1. Your tasting
2. Meeting with florist to make all floral selections
3. Meeting with Bakery to select wedding cake
4. Hair/Make-up Trial
5. Rehearsal Dinner and Post-Wedding Brunch site exploration/selection

Depending on the length of your engagement, the number of your pre-wedding site trips will vary.  Certainly take advantage of more trips if possible.

You will want to become well educated about the marriage license requirements of the state in which you are marrying.  Another trip within two months of your wedding date may be required in order for you to obtain a marriage license.

Lastly, be sure to take time off the week before your wedding and be sure to arrive to your destination well in advance of your wedding day!

To plan a Marriott wedding, call the Marriott of your choice and ask to consult with the hotel's wedding event planner. For more information on Marriott Hotels, Resorts, and Suites, call 1-800-228-9290 or see www.marriott.com.